Obedience, sacrifice, confession, repentance these are deeply personal spiritual practices, best shared in a trusted community. Unfortunately these practices and postures of the heart can become yokes that people are pressured into bearing. But condemnation, fear of failure, inadequacy is not how the Spirit moves us into spiritual discipline.
In 2014 our family took on a huge project: we thru-hiked the Appalachian Trail together. The story of that hike is told in our video series and bits and pieces were shared here on the blog. It was a life changing family adventure but also very difficult for me on many levels. Our adventure came on the heels of a three year spell of international and inter-provincial moves, a switch to self-employment, and living in a different culture.
As a security-seeking, routine-loving homebody I ended our Appalachian Trail hike burnt out and drained from the physical, emotional and mental demands of our journey. This reality combined with a family history of anxiety and depression and personal experience with two bouts of mild depression necessitates a roadmap to recovery. That is what this project is.
- Searching for vision in my vocation - I didn't have a clear vision but maybe vision is overrated, and it was more important to just "do stuff", or maybe I would find one through bumbling around.
- Forty - I rediscovered who I really am, in a sense I returned to my roots, I re-found my identity in the wholeness of Jesus.
- October - I find my groove in our new home and community and return to my roots for a wedding celebration.
- Summer Stories ~ Fashion and Beauty - I've underestimated and undervalued the restorative, healing, and life-giving power of feeling beautiful.
- The summer I made sushi - Life's trials don't stop for summer but so much about this summer felt like healing to me.
- Mid-Summer and settling in to Montreal - I don't know if this is the breakthrough I've been seeking, or just a reprieve, but something's mending here.
- Facing my writing anxiety - For a while now writing has made me anxious, today I'm engaging that anxiety.
- Summer Check-In - It's just life, and life for me this summer, at least so far, doesn't involve a lot of writing.
- Blogging through a mid-life crisis - I may not know exactly who I am right now and what I want to do with my life but there's no reason to throw the baby out with the bathwater; i.e. make rash decisions about the blog.
- Hard Stuff - A week of new marital honesty and looking into dark corners I hadn't yet dared to go.
- Moving to Montreal - It's another adventure, but it's an adventure where security is as important as freedom.
- The Structure of Project Home & Healing - The outline and structure for my year long project.
- Middle March: rewriting the script - This winter proved to me that "I struggle through winter" does not need to be the only reality or option for me moving forward.
- 10 more weeks of winter (a Project Home & Healing update) - A Project Home & Healing outline and early winter update.
- Project Home & Healing: The Kitchen Table - The Kitchen Table is an email group I'm leading in conjunction with Project Home & Healing.
- Year of the Fallowed Field - My two life themes for 2015 are to heal and lie fallow.
- My heart lives here - When I came home from our hike all battered and bruised inside, questioning my worth, I looked at these children as a remembrance of what I have accomplished and what I value.
- Redecorating the tree - There is a return this season, winter of all seasons, to loving me.
- How the light gets in - A breaking allows the light to illuminate the truth of the matter.
- Checking in - I need to write my way to understanding and discovery. I need to write my way to healing.
- Already laid bare - After a season of steadily moving moving north, and before that a hyperdrive season of getting ourselves south, this fall and winter I am staying put and slowing down.
- For Thanksgiving - Returning to my roots - to music, relationships and family history - is part of my post-hike wellness strategy.
- The beach at high tide - Enjoying the beauty of nature and being with my kids in the amazing outdoors.
- An unraveling of sorts - I am doing what comes naturally to me, what I am strong at, and feel confident in: creating a structure to help me solve a problem.
- Where I'm at - A post-hike breakdown precipitates the need for a healing journey.